Leaving

Sometime I feel like my life is characterized by people leaving. People that either mean a lot to me themselves or in the role they play. Sometimes it's leaving, often for very understandable reasons so it's not like I can be mad at them or hold it against them. Sometimes it's been quitting. Sometimes I feel like it's giving up.

It started in 10th grade and ever since it's just kept continuing. I'm sure everybody experiences people leaving and it's part of life and growing up. It still hurts and is still something that has bothered me for a while.

First it was Patti. This was the first time I experienced the sadness of someone leaving. Someone I felt close to and looked up to. Met her February 04. She moved mid summer 05. It was less than a week after meeting her that I talked with her and gave my life to Christ.

Then it was JT. He was the only youth minister I'd had and youth was my world.

Shortly after JT left it was Mr. Madison, the band teacher. Band and youth, the two things I cared about most.

Those were all within a 6 month time period.

About half a year later we get a new youth minister, Steve. A little over a year later Steve leaves.

Band we got a new teacher. She finished out the second semester of 10th grade. 11th grade another new band teacher. He didn't last long either. We get another band teacher he stayed for the rest of my time in band.

Speaking of teachers should I mention how many home ec teachers came and went in one year in 10th grade. Not that I was close to any of them or cared that much about home ec but we had at least 5, maybe 6. Even though I might not of cared much about them the first lady (or was she second) was pretty sweet. I still remember the day she asked me if everything was okay. She'd never asked me this before and I don't think I was that noticeably upset but she just knew. Of course I said I was fine but that actually was the day after JT told us he was leaving.

Let's see who's next? It was Catherine and Brent. They helped with the youth group. They came around near the time Patti and Bradley were leaving. They moved beginning of summer 08. I don't know if there is someone around now that reminds me of Catherine but I feel like I can hear her words of wisdom. Like I have a little Catherine conscience.

High school is done with and I saw high school friendships fade away. I saw another important friendship beginning to fade away. That friendship fading hurt the most out of the friends.

On to college. College Sunday school. I'm not in youth anymore so I'm in the college Sunday school and I want to love it just as much. First set of teachers: Garbarinos moved and Smarts quit. Year two Matt comes along. Lasts until summer. Granted he is the middle school youth minster and in seminary he has more than enough to do. Now we have Lindsay. We'll see for how long, I pray for a while. The college Sunday school is actually becoming something.

Mrs. Richards who I babysit for is moving to Houston. Another family I babysit regularly for may be moving, I don't know the definite on this one.

And all that leads us up to now. Mandy told us tonight that she accepted a job at the BCM at the University of Tennessee. I asked her who was supposed to help me find my husband if she leaves? Trying to use some humor instead of tears.

There have been enough tears in typing all this but I had to get it out.

Maybe now I need to shift my focus from people leaving to appreciating the people who are still here. (Not implying I don't appreciate the people who have left. If I didn't appreciate them I wouldn't be upset).