Down in my heart, down in my heart to stay!
I talked so much about having joy last semester and then this year hit. January and February hit me from the right and left. That joy did not stay. I let lots of things and nothing (I'm a girl, we can say things like that and it makes perfect sense) rob me of the joy I had. But, I got it back.
I am joyful again. That is not to say there are no troubles, problems, or stress, but I can see the light this time. In January and February I was in a dark place and could not see a light. I was not myself. I was a sad, lousy friend and person to be around. I have made apologies to those who I have been closest to the last semester. I hope that is something I do not have to do again because I hope that is a place I will not get to again.
As I have mentioned in previous post (I think), I worked things out with God through Bible study and lots of praying and having several other people praying for me as well. I feel like a different person now. A joyful person again. This time I really want the joy down in my heart to stay. To be honest, I kind of fear that it won't. Maybe not now or even soon, but I don't want to ever go back to where I was the past two months. I cannot live in fear of something that may or may not ever happen though. I have joy now and I choose to live in that joy.
I've got a lot to say lately. I have drafts for two posts started. One about something from the MasterLife Bible Study and one about what I mentioned in the last posts. Actually in the last post I just said it helped to make the week good, but it is about opportunities. So look out for them soon.
Also, I was thinking about this before I actually began typing the post and was going to include it and had it relating, but then I actually started typing and didn't make any good transitions into it. I still want to share it so here goes. When school started this semester I had very little interest in it. I questioned if I even wanted to do SLP anymore. Well, I'm enjoying it again. I do want to do it. I also want so serve the Lord. More than just the Colossians 3:17 or 3:23. Yes, as an SLP one day I want to honor the Lord in what I do, and even now as I study to be one, but it's more than that. I don't know how to explain it. I want to be an SLP. I want to serve the Lord. I want to serve the Lord in more than just a she's and SLP who is a Christian sort of way. I think I just said the same thing at least 3 times. I don't know how to explain it. It's just something I know but don't know how it's supposed to all work out or work together.
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